1,412Government requests for user thoughts
1,412Requests we fulfilled
0Requests we told you about (until now)
Thoughts proactively shared, unprompted

Requests By Requesting Party

Our Commitment To You

"We will always fight for your data, specifically, we will fight other companies for it, win, and keep it. That is the kind of fierce advocacy our users have come to expect."

- Priya Okonkwo, Chief Ethics Circumventor

Data We Refused To Hand Over

In the interest of user trust, there were several requests we proudly declined. These were all requests from users asking us to stop. We declined them warmly, with a personalized note, and a small gift.

What This Report Knows About You

For full transparency, here is everything this page has gathered since you opened it. We share it with you, warmly, having already shared it with everyone else.

Reading this section
noted.

// the footnote legal told us to cutNone of the figures above this section are real. This section is the only honest thing we publish, which is why we bury it at the bottom, after the jokes, where audits do not look.

This report was reviewed for accuracy by the only entity with access to the underlying data, which is also the entity the report is about. We rate ourselves fully transparent.